There’s something about having a local friend at the same stage of life as you and with a child similar in age to help entertain your own that makes your life- and your mental health!- so much easier.

If you’re a new parent (or just new to the Asheville area) feeling completely out of their element and desperate to find their tribe (or even just one like-minded soul), I’ve made a list of proven options that can help you figure out where to go in Asheville to make new mom friends. 

When photographing and chatting with many of my moms-to-be, new moms, or a recently relocated clients there’s one conversation that almost always comes up. 

Surprisingly, it’s not about their kids or significant other. 

It’s about how badly they wish they had a go-to mom friend to hang out with. 

There’s something about having a local friend at the same stage of life as you and with a child similar in age to help entertain your own that makes your life- and your mental health!- so much easier.

Adult conversations… Companionship for your kids… Someone who can relate to what you’re going through…

These benefits are huge and frankly can be an absolute sanity saver!

I often find myself sharing stories of things I did or places I went that resulted in many of the friendships that helped me through my kids’ early years.  

So, if you’re a new mom (or a mom new to the Asheville area) feeling completely out of their element and desperate to find their tribe (or even just one like-minded soul), I’ve made a list of proven options that can help. 

1. The Internet

Finding mom friends really can feel just like dating! So is it any wonder that the internet has become the go to resource for those trying to establish a platonic connection as well? And just like romantic dating, there are many options to choose from. Here are some local resources which have worked for me and other local moms. 

Facebook Groups:

Asheville Mamas: I’m convinced you can’t have a Facebook account, have children, and live within a 50 mile radius of Asheville and not be a member of this page. This means you are exposed to a HUGE assortment of personality types, so be prepared. It also means that no matter what questions you have or personality types you gel with, there is guaranteed to be someone that can help/relate. It’s also not unusual for people to post a “searching for…” friend description or meetup to help form mom groups with various similar interests. 

Asheville Moms of Multiples: If you’re a mom (or mom-to-be) of multiples this page is for you! Self described as a local non-profit organization dedicated to providing an opportunity for parents of multiples (twins, triplets, etc) to build friendships, find encouragement, increase parenting knowledge within the club and in the community, and have some fun! Every local mom or mom-to-be of multiples I know swears by this page. 

Asheville Area Moms: I’m less familiar with this group, but my understanding from those in it, is that they commonly plan mom outings for those who are interested in physically getting together (perfect for what you’re looking for!)

The motto for Asheville Area Moms is CONNECT–>ENCOURAGE–>SUPPORT

CONNECT—-> By meeting moms at our weekly meetups, park play, monthly Mom’s Night Out events and biannual family events. Also make connections by interacting with other moms by commenting on posts or posting directly in the group.

ENCOURAGE—-> By letting moms know they are not alone in the struggles no one talks about. Lift up other moms with encouraging and sincere comments and posts.

SUPPORT—–> Give moms resources when needed, warm words of encouragment and sharing stories of real life.

***Note that even though all of these groups have mama in their names, they’re open to dads as well!!!***

Meetup.com:

This is actually where I found my very first mama group years ago. 

Their tagline says it all:

“Find your people!

Make time for your interests and meet people who share them. Lasting connections are made on Meetup.” 

Imagine a space where all you have to do is click on what you are looking for and then a list of local groups pop up that fill your needs. Once you join, most have a list of activities where you can pop in and go to as much or as little as you like. Every group has its own rules and regulations but I found this to be a nice, non-threatening way to put myself out there- and it worked! 

The Peanut app: 

I’ll be honest, this is probably the one I know the least about but it looks like a great idea!

Think Bumble.com or Match.com but for female friends (sorry dads!). 

They describe themselves as “a safe space for women to connect whether you’re navigating fertility, pregnancy, motherhood or menopause.”

2. Local Libraries

Even if you haven’t been to a library since high school, you will definitely want to give them another chance once you have a baby or small child- especially if you live in Buncombe county!

I’m pretty sure my local library’s storytime (https://www.buncombecounty.org/governing/depts/library/services/children.aspx) was sometimes the highlight of my week. It is a great way to get out of the house rain or shine and have a guaranteed time when your small child (and you!) can get some social interaction. Another plus, often the same parents would come and soon enough many of us were making plans to meet for lunch or coffee to help extend our hang-out time together. 

As an added bonus, Buncombe libraries also have an amazing resource called a Zoom Pass (https://www.buncombecounty.org/governing/depts/library/services/zoom-local-attraction-pass.aspx) which gives free admission to a ton of kid friendly attractions. I would often plan something with the same library parent(s) so we could hang out beyond “story time day.”

3. Kid classes

What’s one thing you and any potential mom friend have in common? Your kids! So use their interests as the perfect bridge to meeting new people. 

My daughter loved to dance and took ballet classes from the time she was 2. Sitting around in a dance lobby for an hour made for endless opportunities for small talk. While not everyone is going to be your new bff, it is a great way to open up some lines of communication and see what can happen. The same daughter ended up begging me to invite the child of one of the mom’s I regularly spoke with to her birthday party and from there we started regularly reaching out to each other for all kinds of activities. She’s actually still one of my best friends!

Not sure of what classes are out there? Here is a small sampling of some awesome kid classes that could be a great fit:

Asheville Community Movement (https://www.ashevillecommunitymovement.com/): A gymnastics studio for older kids, they have open gym times for ages 0-3 and a more structured class for ages 2 and up. They also are one of the few spots that offer summer camp options for younger kids. 

The Little Gym (https://www.thelittlegym.com/AshevilleNC/classes) is another gymnastics and movement option for ages 4 months and up.  

Soccer Shots: (https://www.soccershots.com/asheville) For kids as young as 3, is a program to introduce children to fundamental soccer principles, such as using your feet, dribbling and the basic rules of the game through fun games, songs and positive reinforcement.

WNC Dance: Super fun dance studio that your child can grow up with. They offer dance classes for ages 2 and up and are located by UNCA. 

Local Youth Sport Leagues: Most of the local districts have their own baseball and basketball leagues you can look into. Both practices and games offer a great opportunity to connect with other parents while you cheer your child on!

Here are some leagues to check out:

https://northbuncombeyouthleague.sportngin.com/

https://erwinyouthleague.sportngin.com/

https://www.southbuncombeyouthsports.com/

4. Playgrounds

The original parent social place, it’s still a classic and Asheville has some amazing play spaces you may not know about. 

Mountain Play Lodge: Not a traditional playground, it’s entirely indoor with play spaces galore! It also is a space where parents can feel safe letting their kids go play without needing to worry about older/rougher kids or their kids wandering. 

Carrier Park Playground: A large, mostly wooden playground set inside a large park that is older kid friendly. Probably one of the most popular parks in Asheville. 

Grovemont Park:  Located right outside the Swannanoa making for a perfect 2-for-1 outing, it has everything a little climber will love as well as the standard playground equipment. Great for those living on the East side. 

Lake Julian Park: One of the larger playgrounds with all the amenities of Lake Julian just steps away. You can even rent a paddleboat or launch a personal (non gas powered) watercraft if interested. 

Lake Louise: Perfect if you have a child who loves looking at ducks or geese, this playground borders a small, man-made lake that houses an assortment of birds, turtles and fish as well as a secluded area with a waterfall and water wheel. As an added bonus, these amenities make for great photography backdrops (Come on, I had to put at least one great photo destination in here!) It’s located in Weaverville. 

5. Your kid’s school

File this one under so obvious you may not even think about it!

This may actually have been my number one back before the internet and classes were so popular (I know, I’m aging myself a bit here).

But seriously, where else are you almost guaranteed to meet someone that not only has a child the same age as yours but also lives close by?! And because they are likely in the same stage of life as you, it’s very likely they are on the hunt for a friend as well. 

Most of the time all it takes is a quick “Hey, we were going to the park / library / ice cream shop from here. Any interest in joining?” to get things started. 

While intimidating, finding and meeting other parents who, like you, are looking to make a connection doesn’t have to feel impossible. Try choosing an option (or multiple ones) that feels the most comfortable for you and see what happens. While you may not see results overnight, as someone who has been there, I can promise that just getting into the habit of putting yourself out there will help you break your mama friend slump.